Sunday, June 30, 2013

AA is not a selfish program. It is a selfless program.

       If you go to enough meetings and know the Big Book of AA you'll find there is quite a lot of mis-information going around in the fellowship. One example is the idea that AA is a selfish program. This could not be farther from the truth.  First of all let's make sure we understand what the AA program actually is. It's read at every meeting but in my experience few of us really understand it. "Here are the steps we took which are suggested as a program of recovery" So the AA program is the 12 steps, nothing less, nothing more. So,  saying that AA is a selfish program is just plain wrong.  Neither the AA program (the 12 steps) or the AA fellowship are selfish. The AA fellowship is an altruistic movement - people helping people. And the 12 steps (our program) are a set of instructions which when followed allows the sufferer to have a normal life through recovery from alcoholism. Following the 12 steps changes a person and steers them away from selfishness toward selflessness - more concern for others. This is the essence of AA spirituality and this is what brings about a relationship strong enough with a God of ones own understanding that gives recovery from alcoholism.

If you ask people who share this "party line" of AA being a selfish program you'll get many opinions as to what the phrase actually means. It's nothing more than another source of confusion; especially for newcomers. It's a shame but I believe there are too many people in the fellowship sharing everything under the sun except how to recover from alcoholism by practicing the 12 steps. Anything I say in meeting shouldn't have to have too much further explanation. Those that share this idea that AA is a selfish program may find they have to explain it quite a bit more if an inquisitive newcomer gets up enough courage to ask. Underneath this phrase lies a world of different opinions as to it's meaning.  Some will say that it means those looking for recovery ought to put it first above everything. That idea is great and absolutely the AA program so why not just say that instead?

       Misleading catch phrases, ideas and information that do not line up with the program are an unfortunate occurrence in today's fellowship. Catch phrases and party lines spread like gossip because they "sound good" and are catchy, but sometimes wind up contradicting the true program of AA entirely. Those of us who have studied the book conclude the opposite. That AA is a SELFLESS program. We are to try to rid ourselves of self centeredness and selfishness through a relationship with a Higher Power if we are to recover.

      The word selfish occurs 13 times in the AA text. In all cases it is looked on as a NEGATIVE feature of character. Here are examples. The idea that AA is a selfish program is not once found in the text. It is a dangerous AA fellowship party line that I suspect is doing more harm than good. Here are some examples.

... selfishness.   BB How It Works, p.62  
Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness

 1.  He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish.


2.
... selfish and dishonest.   BB How It Works, p.61  
On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest.


3.
... selfish and foolish, I had been seriously ...   BB Bill's Story, p.7  
Best of all, I met a kind doctor who explained that though certainly selfish and foolish, I had been seriously ill, bodily and mentally.


4.
Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the ...   BB Into Action, p.82  
Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil.


5.
... selfish, dishonest or afraid?   BB Into Action, p.86  
Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid?


6.
... selfish, dishonest, or inconsiderate?   BB How It Works, p.69  
Where had we been selfish, dishonest, or inconsiderate?


7.
... selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?   BB How It Works, p.67  
Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?


8.
... selfish ends.   BB Into Action, p.87  
We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends.


9.
... selfish of water or bread.   12&12 Tradition One, p.131  
None might become selfish of water or bread.


10.
... selfish or not?   BB How It Works, p.69  
We subjected each relation to this test -- was it selfish or not?


11.
... selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage ...   12&12 Step Four, p.50  
When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me?


12.
... selfish things and gain interest in our ...   BB Into Action, p.84  
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.


13.
... selfish, we may excite jealousy, misery, and ...   12&12 Step Eight, p.80  
If our sex conduct is selfish, we may excite jealousy, misery, and a strong desire to retaliate in kind.

AA excerpts used according to AA fair use policy.
All other text (c) 2011 Bring Thehope

2 comments:

  1. You did not explain what is meant by 'this is a selfish program'. I heard someone who has been 'sober' for over 10 years say that just the other night and thought, what on earth?! It is meant to mean that we are very guarded about maintaining sobriety, but really it is nothing more than taken straight from the bible once again,..I fear AA lies and isn't honest about the source of where they really got their foundation from and that is JESUS, but they took out the priniplces and stripped them of the Source itself and turned into exactly that, a SELFISH PROGRAM under the guise of humility, but do they have the Humility to Claim Christ as their Salvation? However, how awesome is He! he knew in advance 2000 years ago this would be the case in saying, "He who is ashamed of Me, My Father in Heaven will be Ashamed of them" Apostle Paul wrote, "Work out your Salvation with fear and trembling"..that 'fear and trembling' was likely understood then as an expression ... So 'work out your salvation" (in AA, sobriety) with Fear and trembling"..is the equivalent. And they say, it works if you work it..now ask, "what words if you work what?"..This really is talking about becoming sanctified in a state of humiliyt before God in "Be Perfect as my Father is Perfect"...being shaped and molded into the person God would have us be. It's a horrible thing that so many in AA have 'a god' of their own imagination than the Truth because they still can't humble themselves but create an illusion instead. I'm getting ready to bail on the program completely, it's just too sad to watch anymore.

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  2. HI Stephen, thank you for your comment. Perhaps I can clear up any misunderstanding. What I am trying to say with this article is that no where in AA literature is it claimed that AA is a selfish program. Through studying the text of AA I have found that saying that AA is a selfish program is not correct. Where this idea came from I do not know. But I do know it is not correct. AA is truly a program of selflessness and it is through abandoning self and doing Gods will that alcoholics can get relief and recovery from alcoholism. Thankfully AA is not affiliated with any religion but does share some common fundamental ideas of spirituality with many of them. If AA was affiliated with any religion at all I probably would have run away a long time ago and died from alcoholism. It is AA's open ending approach to spirituality which makes the idea of depending on God much easier for apprehensive and pessimistic alcoholics like myself. Cheers and I hope this helps ~BringTheHope

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