I was homeless for awhile, I slept in my car many days back in fall of 1992 and lost two jobs in one weekend at a low point. I wanted to stop, tried but could not. I failed on my own 20+ times in 3 years. I went to meetings but that wasn't enough.
My life was literally in the gutter for awhile. The first right thing I did for myself was ask for help in a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.
It's the alcoholic ego which almost always gets alcoholics in trouble for they seem to have a yearning to want to "look good" and many lack the humility to admit they don't have all the answers, especially when it comes to their drinking. Many alcoholics first balk at the steps and spiritual ideas in AA. Those desperate enough to try and find the humility to go at it without question experience miracles. That was my experience. Once I gave up trying to do it my way and did it AA's way (working the steps) I stayed sober and have a great life now.
I do not have a personal agenda to see anyone fail in trying to beat the drinking game. More power to you if you can quit for good or moderate with out taking the steps or AA. Although if you be a real alcoholic that happy day may not arrive as, to my knowledge there are no other good or successful alternatives.
I am pretty certain what many mistake for success in beating alcoholism without some form of spirituality are the stories of heavy drinkers putting it down or moderating given sufficient reason. Alcoholics, by AA's definition of the illness, completely lack this ability. AA found that real alcoholics lack control and cannot moderate or stay sober happily for any significant amount of time on self will. Heavy drinkers can.
I have seen people in meetings who have not latched onto a higher power in AA. They do not really try AA. They use the fellowship as a sober social club and don't work the 12 steps. All through AA literature it makes clear seeking a power greater than yourself to solve alcoholism is what the program is all about. Most alcoholics I've known who haven't sought a higher power in AA (through continual practice of the steps and putting them into their lives, are not very happy and some have unfortunate, very tragic endings.
Case in point, I went to many AA meetings in Los Angeles and quite a few of them in my opinion seemed to be attended by people who could simply "put the plug in the jug" and stay sober just through the fellowship. They seemed to have made AA there sober Elks Club or maybe more fitting Hollywood, the drunk squad extension of the Screen Actors Guild. I heard tragic stories of people who were not quite as alcoholic as I, and very lucky, stay sober for 10 years or more and then drink again when a calamity occured which was too much to take. One couple I became familiar with were a supreme example. The husband was sober 12 years and killed himself, this man was a regular attendee of AA. The wife, also an attendee herself then drank again over it. When I went to a few of the meetings they were going to and heard what was being said there I knew what the problem was. Hardly anyone was talking about working the program of AA, they were busy using the meeting as a dumping ground for "what was going on with them". It just seemed more like a therapy session, not Alcoholics Anonymous. Unfortunately the reason many modern day AA groups fail to produce any respectable success rate is that they are too diluted with non-AA program ideas. These ideas come in from therapy sessions and treatment centers which charge exorbitant fees to embellish the AA program or make it unique to there business so they can charge for their services. It's a tragic reality of life. I hope many do not pay the ultimate price for it.
The program is simple, it's in the first 164 pages of the Big Book of AA. Once I became humble enough to take a look and really study it I found out how simple it was. But some of it is not easy. There is a price to pay. Some work has to be done. But once I really tried my new life began. That's been my experience. It works if you work it. I found out the hard way. But there is hope -- in doing the 12 steps.
Bring Thehope
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